Please join us for a vigil Wednesday to remember young people who have taken their lives

Please let me invite you to join us Wednesday at 7 pm on the north steps of the Rotunda at the University of Virginia where students will be leading a candlelight vigil.

We will gather to remember young people who have recently committed suicide stemming from being bullied for being gay or appearing to be gay. Whatever your theological stance on sexuality issues, I hope you can join us in calling for an end to bullying, to reach out with kindness and love, and to remember our young people whose lives were cut short.

A number of Charlottesville religious leaders, including myself, will be there.

Meanwhile, this statement was released Monday, signed by the national and international leaders of many faith communities, including our own Presiding Bishop Katharine Jefferts Schori. Please take a few moments to read, and join us Wednesday on the steps or in your prayers.

CLERGY AGAINST BULLYING
CALL FOR ACTION AND TIME OF HEALING
IN WAKE OF GAY TEEN SUICIDES AND ANTI-GAY VIOLENCE

For Immediate Release: October 18, 2010

Today, as leaders of Christian communions and national networks, we speak with heavy hearts because of the bullying, suicides and hate crimes that have shocked this country and called all faith communities into accountability for our words or our silence. We speak with hopeful hearts, believing that change and healing are possible, and call on our colleagues in the Church Universal to join us in working to end the violence and hatred against our lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender brothers and sisters.

In the past seven weeks, six young and promising teenagers took their own lives. Some were just entering high school; one had just enrolled in college. Five were boys; one, a girl becoming a young woman. These are only the deaths for which there has been a public accounting. New reports of other suicides continue to haunt us daily from around the country.

They were of varying faiths and races and came from different regions of the nation.

The one thing these young men and women had in common was that they were perceived to be gay or lesbian.

Each in their own way faced bullying and harassment or struggled with messages of religion and culture that made them fear the consequences of being who they were.

In the past two weeks, cities like New York have seen major escalations in anti-gay violence. Two young men attacked patrons of the Stonewall Inn, legendary birth place of the LGBT rights movement in the United States, locking them in the restroom and beating them while hurling anti-gay epithets. Men on a Chelsea street, saying goodnight after an evening out, were attacked by a group of teens and young adults, again hurling anti-gay slogans and hurting one person badly enough to require emergency treatment. And nine young men in the Bronx went on a two-day rampage beating, burning, torturing and sodomizing two teenage boys and their gay male adult friend for allegedly having a sexual relationship. "It's nothing personal," one of the now arrested said. "You just broke the rules."

What are the "rules" of human engagement and interaction that we, as people of faith, want to teach our congregants, children and adults alike, to live by?

Many have responded from within and beyond the faith community offering comfort and support to the families and friends of Billy Lucas, Seth Walsh, Asher Brown, Tyler Clementi, Raymond Chase and Aiyisha Hasan. Our hearts, too, are broken by the too soon losses of these young and promising lives, and we join our voices to those who have sought to speak words of comfort and healing.

Many others, however, have responded by adding insult to injury, citing social myths and long-held prejudices that only fuel division, hatred and violence – and sometimes even death.

We, as leaders of faith, write today to say we must hold ourselves accountable, and we must hold our colleagues in the ministry, accountable for the times, whether by our silence or our proclamations, our inaction or our action, we have fueled the kinds of beliefs that make it possible for people to justify violence in the name of faith. Condemning and judging people because of their sexual orientation or gender identity can have deadly consequences, both for the victims of hate crimes and those who commit them.

There is no excuse for inspiring or condoning violence against any of our human family. We may not all agree on what the Bible says or doesn't say about sexuality, including homosexuality, but this we do agree on: The Bible says, "God is love, and those who abide in love abide in God and God in them." Abiding in love – together – is the rule we must all preach, teach, and seek to live by.

People of faith must realize that if teens feel they will be judged by their church, rejected by their families and bullied by their peers, they may have nowhere to turn.

Too many things go unspoken in our communities. It's time to talk openly and honestly about the diversity of God's creation and the gift of various sexual orientations and gender identities – and to do that in a way that makes it safe for people to disagree and still abide in love.

It's time to talk openly and honestly about the use and misuse of power and authority by those we entrust with our spiritual well-being. It's time to make it safe for our clergy colleagues who are struggling to live what they preach, to get the help and support we all sometimes need.

The young people who took their lives a few weeks ago died because the voices of people who believe in the love of God for all the people of God were faint and few in the face of those who did the bullying, harassing and condemning. Today we write to say we will never again be silent about the value of each and every life.

To that end, we pledge to urge our churches, our individual parishes or offices, our schools and religious establishments to create safe space for each and every child of God, without regard to sexual orientation or gender identity. And we ask you to join us in that pledge.

Today, we personally pledge to be LGBT and straight people of faith standing together for the shared values of decency and civility, compassion and care in all interactions. We ask you, our colleagues, to join us in this pledge.

We want our children and the children of the communities we serve to grow up knowing that God loves all of us and that without exception, bullying and harassment, making fun of someone for perceived differences, and taunting and harming others is wrong. The Golden Rule is still the rule we want to live by.

We pray today that you will join us in being the faces of a faith that preaches and demonstrates God's universal acceptance and offers to one and all safe space to live, to learn, and to love and be loved.

In faith and solidarity,

HEADS OF COMMUNIONS
The Rev. Michael Kinnamon, General Secretary of the National Council of Churches
The Rev. Geoffrey Black, United Church of Christ General Minister and President
Elder Cynthia J. Bolbach, Moderator, 219th General Assembly, Presbyterian Church (USA)
The Most Reverend Katharine Jefferts Schori, Presiding Bishop and Primate, The Episcopal Church
The Rev. Gradye Parsons, Stated Clerk, 219th General Assembly, Presbyterian Church (USA)
The Rev. Bruce Reyes-Chow, Moderator, 218th General Assembly of the Presbyterian Church (USA)
The Rev. Wesley Granberg-Michaelson, General Secretary, Reformed Church in America
The Rev. Peter Morales, President, Unitarian Universalist Association
Bishop Yvette Flunder, Presiding Bishop of The Fellowship
The Rev. Elder Nancy Wilson, Moderator of Metropolitan Community Churches
Bishop Tonyia M. Rawls, Vice President of the National Board and Regional Prelate, Unity Fellowship Church
Archbishop Carl Bean, Founder and Presiding Prelate, Unity Fellowship Church Movement
Carol Blythe, Alliance of Baptists President
Paula Clayton Dempsey, Minister for Partnership Relations, Alliance of Baptists

NATIONAL FAITH STAFF OF LGBT ADVOCACY ORGANIZATIONS
The Rev. Harry Knox, Director of Religion and Faith Program, Human Rights Campaign Foundation
The Rev. Rebecca Voelkel, Director of Institute for Welcoming Resources, National Gay & Lesbian Task Force
Dr. Sylvia Rhue, Director of Religious Affairs, National Black Justice Coalition
Ann Craig, Director of Religion, Faith and Values, Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD)

NATIONAL STAFF OF FAITH BASED ORGANIZATIONS
The Rev. Michael Schuenemeyer, Executive Director of UCAN, Inc., United Church of Christ
The Rev. Robert Chase, Founding Director, Intersections International
Macky Alston, Director, Auburn Media, Auburn Theological Seminary
The Rev. Mark Hostetter, Chair of the Board, Auburn Seminary
Sung Park, Program Director, Believe Out Loud
The Rev. Dr. C. Welton Gaddy, President of The Interfaith Alliance
The Reverend Debra W. Haffner, Executive Director, Religious Institute
Sister Jeannine Gramick, SL, Executive Coordinator, National Coalition of American Nuns (NCAN)
The Rev. Neal Christie, Assistant General Secretary of the United Methodist Board of Church & Society
The Rev. Cynthia Abrams , Program Director, General Board of Church and Society, United Methodist Church ,
Linda Bales Todd, Director, General Board of Church and Society of the United Methodist Church
The Rev. Dr. Cindi Love, Executive Director, Soulforce, Inc.

NATIONAL STAFF OF LGBT DENONMINATIONAL GROUPS
Emily Eastwood, Executive Director, Lutherans Concerned/North America
Lisa Larges, Minister Coordinator, That All May Freely Serve, Presbyterian
Dr. Michael Adee, Executive Director, More Light Presbyterians
Troy Plummer, Reconciling Ministries Network, United Methodist
Marilyn Paarlberg, National Coordinator, Room for All, Reformed Church in America
Rev. Thomas C. Goodhart, Co-president, Room for All, Reformed Church in America
Phil Attey, Acting Executive Director - Catholics for Equality
George W. Cole, Senior Vice President, Affirmation: Gay and Lesbian Mormons
David Melson, President, Affirmation: Gay and Lesbian Mormons
Dr. Joseph Palacios, Board Member, Catholics for Equality
Phil Attey, Executive Director, Catholics for Equality
Yolanda Elliott, President, Seventh-day Adventist Kinship International
Pastor Dave Ferguson, Church Relations Director, Adventist Kinship International
Rev. Marvin M. Ellison, Ph.D., Co-Convener, Religious Coalition Against Discrimination, Maine
Anne Underwood, Catholics for Equality
Max Niedzwiecki, Ph.D., Executive Director, Integrity USA

THEOLOGICANS AND ACADEMIC LEADERS
Dr. Michael Eric Dyson, Professor of Sociology at Georgetown University.
Mary E. Hunt & Diana Neu, Women's Alliance for Theology, Ethics and Ritual (WATER)

The Monday Funnies

It's time again for the Monday Funnies, and a few groaners from buddy Pat Hill. Don't blame me, blame Pat. Enjoy your Monday...

* * *

The occasion of Jesus to address the demoniac by casting his demons out into the nearby swine, which, in turn ran over the edge of the cliff to a quick demise, was the first occasion in the Bible which gave rise to the use of the term, "deviled ham."

* * *

The teacher told the Bible story to the class about Philip and the eunuch intent on showing the joy of becoming a Christian. Testing the class, the teacher asked, "Why did the eunuch go on his way rejoicing?"

Came the prompt reply, "Because Philip quit preaching!"

* * *

Having just moved to town, a woman decided that the first Sunday, she'd visit the church nearest to her new apartment.

She found herself in a pretty sanctuary, and as the service began, she enjoyed the music offered by the choir. But then the sermon began, and went on and on and on.
In fact, it seemed interminable, and not at all interesting. Surreptitiously glancing around, she noticed that many in the congregation were nodding off, and not even trying to stay awake.

Finally it was over, though, and people stood up for the final hymn.
After the service, to be social, she turned to the still sleepy looking gentleman next to her, extended her hand in greeting, and said,

"Hello, I'm Gladys Dunn."

To this the gentleman replied, "Me too!"

Blessings this Sunday

Dear friends,

My apologies for not posting in the last few days. I've been busy tending to family matters and plan to get back on track in this space in the next few days. Last Wednesday, I was able to attend the installation of the Rev. Mark Richardson as the new president and dean of the Church Divinity School of the Pacific, and I will have more to say on that and the broader issue of theological education.

Today, please keep my family in your prayers and may many blessings be with you always.

Faithfully,

Jim+

It's Bye Bye Baby!

Sorry, Virginians, I know you probably have no idea what that headline means. Well, click below, and turn up the volume. This jingle has been imbedded in my brain since 1962 when my dad took me to Candlestick Park to see Willie Mays play. Back in those days, whenever Willie or another Giant would hit a home run, KSFO broadcaster Russ Hodges would scream "It's bye bye baby!" The jingle was born.

And by tonight, I will back in the City by the Golden Gate for a little business and connecting with family and friends. Go Giants!

The Monday Funnies

This is 1 minute and 37 seconds of total delight. This will start your work week off right. Enjoy the Monday Funnies . . .

No more outcasts

Today's sermon begins with the tragedy touched on in this space the last few days, the suicide of a young gay student in New Jersey. I pray we can find ourselves in a place of hope. The gospel lesson today is particularly apt: Luke 17:11-19.

* * *

I have a difficult, painful topic I want to talk with you about today. This is not a joyful topic, and I apologize to you if this sermon causes you pain.

Many of us this week were moved to tears by the story of Tyler Clementi, a freshman at Rutgers University in New Jersey. His roommate had surreptitiously videoed him while having relations with another man, and then posted it on the Internet with a few choice gay-bashing words.

What happened next is just tragic. Tyler jumped off the George Washington Bridge to his death.

We don’t know what went through Tyler’s mind, but he must have felt very alone, very shamed, an outcast in this world. We wish Tyler had felt differently. But he didn’t.

Let’s be clear about something: The world creates outcasts, not God. Politics creates outcasts, not God. Prejudice and ignorance creates outcasts, not God. Sadly, religion creates outcasts, not God.

Sometimes being an outcast has nothing to do with status from material wealth.
Sometimes being an outcast comes from being in the wrong tribe, or the wrong clique, or the wrong race, or the wrong religion, or the wrong gender, or the wrong sexual orientation – or just plain looking wrong. The world creates many wrong places to be.

It can be so very hard to be young and different than your peers when you know you just don’t fit in.

There was a news report the other day about a high school in Ohio that has had four suicides by students who were bullied. One was bullied because he liked to wear pink. Another was bullied because she had a Serbian accent.

We need to say enough. No more of this. God wants better than this. We need to do better than this for our children.

I think it incumbent upon us in the Church to stand with those who are outcasts or hurting or shunned or bullied, because I believe to the bottom of my bones that Jesus is weeping with them.

There are times when all I have are tears. There are times when I do not know what to say.

There are times when I am listening to someone who is very ill, or has experienced a tragedy or a loss, and I just don’t know what to say.

Sometimes the best I can manage is silence. I pray that my silence will be enough.

I have no words to explain why some people get sick while others get well, or why some people are hurt or bullied, and others seem to glide through life unhurt.
On one level, this healing business perplexes me. Life is not fair, life is ambiguous, life can be cruel, but none of that that is an explanation for anything.

In our parish, we’ve witnessed quite a bit of heartbreak lately. Two long-time members, Bill Lassetter and Sally Kauzlarich, both died in the last week after difficult illnesses.

We’ve had 21 funerals this year in the parish – that is an average one every other week. We had a service for Sally yesterday and we will have a service for Bill next week. That is just too many.

Sometimes there are miracles. And sometimes there aren’t. Why, I don’t know. I don’t have all the answers.

That question is squarely in front of us in today’s gospel lesson. We meet ten lepers who are healed, who get a miracle. Why should they be healed and others not?

Outwardly, the story is quite simple: Jesus tells them to go visit a priest and they will be healed. The lepers go and are healed, and nine of the ten go on their way.
But one of the lepers, a Samaritan, returns to thank Jesus; and Jesus tells him “faith has made him well.”

This is a shocking story on many levels.

Lepers are outcasts, and in the time of Jesus, lepers were required to live outside the gates of the city. They look awful, and they live in a filthy trash heap.

They are supposed to shout warnings to healthy people to stay away, but this group of lepers breaks all the rules. They cry out to Jesus asking him to join them.
And so he does.

As if that wasn’t stunning enough, one of lepers is a Samaritan. In the cast system of the ancient Jewish world, Samaritans are the lowest of the low, the untouchables, the dirtiest of the dirty people.

So here we have someone who is both a leper and a Samaritan – an outcast among the outcasts – who is healed by Jesus, and then he returns to thank Jesus.
Everyone else disappears, but it is the lowest of the low who comes back with the gift of thanks.

It is an outcast who outwardly has nothing to be thankful for, nothing to be faithful about, who has been dumped upon his entire life – it is this untouchable Samaritan leper who gives thanks.

And Jesus honors this outcast.

Jesus tells the Samaritan something extraordinary – that it is his offering of thanks that has made him well and set him free.

Healing is not a reward, healing is not earned by following the rules. Rather, healing – grace – comes as a free gift from God alone.

Please notice something really important: Jesus has just re-defined the very definition of faith. It is not adherence to a set of precepts or dogmas, or a mental exercise of intellectual understanding.

Rather, faith is defined as gratitude. Simple gratitude. Faith is about giving thanks.
The outcast has something important to teach us with his thanks. By giving thanks the Samaritan is set free to live, and to live with joy.

And that raises a few questions for me, and I hope for you.

What if we were use the word “thanks” instead of the word “faith”? What would that sound like to you?

Try substituting the word every time you hear it, see how it sounds.

Instead of saying “I have faith in God,” what if you said, “I give thanks to God”?

Instead of saying we belong to a “faith community,” what if we said we belong to a “thanks community”?

Instead of saying, “I don’t have enough faith,” what if you said “I don’t have enough thanks”?

What would change for you by saying that? By living that?

And ask yourself today: For what do you give thanks?

What brings you joy in your life? Give thanks for that. What makes you laugh? Give thanks for that. Who supports and upholds you especially in your worst moments? Give thanks to them.

Give thanks and you will be this close to God.

And those who give you support, and make you laugh, see in them the face of Christ. They are this close to God. Show your thanks to them and you are showing thanks to God.

Or how about this – instead of using the shopworn churchy word “stewardship,” what if we substituted the word “gratitude” for that? Instead of calling it the annual “stewardship campaign,” what if we said we are having a “gratitude campaign” this season?

What would it look like if we saw our giving as a tangible way of thanking God for the life we have and the abundance we enjoy?

What if our giving came not out of obligation or guilt, but out of joy and delight? How much would you give if your giving brings you joy? How much joy would you like to spread around?

And who needs your joy? Who are the outcasts near you who could use some of that? Can we find the Tyler Clementis in this world, show them our love, and give them our thanks for being who they are?

What would happen if we bring a little hope and healing – and a little joy – to those whose lives are linked with ours? What might change for them and for us when we do that?

Let me put it squarely. I believe we can be the hands and feet of Christ Jesus in our world, and it can begin to do that by giving thanks.

Maybe I’ve asked the wrong question about why some are healed, and some are not, in this world.

These stories of Jesus healing people are really meant to give us a window into the limitless love of God for all of us in this world and in the next.

What if we hear in these stories of Jesus healing the sick and outcasts the ultimate expression of the nature of God? What if see in Jesus the embodiment of a God who will find the lost sheep, who will be with us no matter the pain, and who will ultimately bring us healing either in this world or in the next.

Maybe then we might hear in these stories of healing lepers and outcasts as expressions of what God wants for all of us, for all of creation.

And then, can we experience healing and gratitude as the very essence of faith and salvation? What would our lives become of we live that knowing the truth of that?
How would we be set free to live here in this world with wonder, with love, and with joy?

May our thanks make us well. Amen.

* * *

My friend Carol Anne sent this link the other day to an essay "Memoirs of a Bullied Kid." The author talks about bullying from first hand experience and what each of us can do about it. This is a difficult post to read, but please read it if you get a chance. You can find it by clicking HERE.

Choosing kindness and a vigil for Tyler Clementi and other gay students who have committed suicide

I hope by now you have heard the story of Tyler Clementi, an 18-year-old freshman at Rutgers University in New Jersey who committed suicide by jumping off the George Washington Bridge. His roommate had secretly videotaped him having relations with another man in their dorm room, and then broadcast it on the internet.

Tyler Clementi was a talented violinist. His suicide left many across the land in shock and tears. We still live in a society where homophobia is accepted in many quarters, and where young gay and lesbian people often feel isolated and alone. We also live in a society where the internet and social media sites like Facebook have become new weapons of cruelty.

Last night I attended a meeting at the University of Virginia to do something about this. The room was filled mostly with students. They want to hold a vigil in Charlottesville on Oct. 20 to remember Tyler and other young gay/lesbian/transgender people who have committed suicide, and I will keep you posted about the details of the vigil as it unfolds.

At the table where I sat, I heard a great deal of commitment to changing the world where we live. As one student said, the vigil must be about "more than tears." It must be about changing hearts, minds and laws.

Sadly, I also heard about how religious leaders have reinforced homophobic bigotry. I heard from gay students who are afraid to walk into a church for fear of being shunned, scorned or worse.

All that is true. All that can change. All that must change. That's why I went last night.

My friend Barbara Crafton, who is an Episcopal priest from New Jersey, wrote this about Tyler Clementi and sent it to her friends from her "Geranium Farm." I share it with you:

KINDNESS: YOU CAN ALWAYS CHOOSE IT

By Barbara Crafton

Here is Tyler, playing his violin. And here he is, smiling at someone off camera. And here is a picture he probably took of himself, holding his cell phone at arm's length, the way people do on Facebook. That he loved music and was an extremely gifted performer. That he went to orchestra rehearsal the day he died, rehearsal for a concert of which he would not be part -- I guess he had not quite gotten to the point of no return then. That he would reach it later in the day. These are some things that even people who didn't know him, know about him. Plus some other things that were his and his alone to share, and were none of our business until he was ready to share them.

There is his ashen father, standing behind the screen door of their house, an haggard older version of Tyler himself. And there is the family's quiet message to the world: "Tyler was a fine young man, and a distinguished musician. The family is heartbroken beyond words. They respectfully request that they be given time to grieve."

Someone opened a memorial page for Tyler on Facebook and more than 124,000 people have "liked" it, which is what you do on Facebook if you want to signal approval of something you see there. Someone else has opened one about the two other students whose cruel prank began the sorry chain of events leading to his suicide last week. Many of those who have posted comments there are young, and some of their comments about the pair are intemperate. So are a couple of posts by people old enough to know better.

It's too easy to press "send" nowadays. Dash something off in the heat of the moment, press a key and it's out there forever. You can never take it back. People you don't know may see it. Your boss may see it, or your next boss, or your fiancee's grandma. This may happen years from now, long after you've forgotten all about whatever it was that caused you to fire a string of epithets into the ether. It's so easy and so fast -- much easier and faster than stopping to consider what is likely to happen as a result of it. We always thought the world would be a gentler place if we could just all communicate better. Now I am not so sure -- we can communicate instantly in several ways, with more waiting in the wings, and all it seems to have gotten us is new ways in which to misunderstand and bully one another.

No, of course that's not all. There is much about it that's good. eLife is real life, too, and virtual community is community -- not the same kind as face-to-face, but not nothing, either. If you're reading this, you're part of a virtual community. All forms of human interaction carry the potential for evil. Cruelty can speak any language.

But so can love. Infinitely elastic and infinitely responsive to its surroundings, whatever they are, love can find its way through the darkest places hate can devise. It shows up uninvited and gets quickly and quietly to work, stirring in the honey of its presence teaspoon by teaspoon, patient and persistent. It cannot undo evil, but it sets up housekeeping right there on evil's front porch, and it refuses to be shooed away. In the end, evil is no match for the sweet stubbornness of love.
+
Everyone at the Geranium Farm sends deepest sympathy to the family of Tyler Clementi, with prayers that this tragic event will help us all remember always, always to choose kindness.

Meeting tonight at UVA to discuss recent suicides by young gay people

I am passing along to you information about an important meeting tonight at 7:30 pm at the University of Virginia to talk about the recent spate of suicides by young gay people at several schools across the country. All of these are heart-breaking. The meeting will be in the Ballroom at Newcomb Hall. I plan to be there.

Here is more information from Rachel Farr, one of the organizers:

Many of you have recently heard about the growing number of LGBTQ youth who have taken their own lives as a result of ongoing and severe victimization and bullying. The stories of Seth Walsh, Billy Lucas, Asher Brown, and Tyler Clementi, in photo above, (among others, see below) are tragic and heartbreaking. These suicides represent a crisis that we can prevent in our community.

[Here are links to information about each of these incidents]:

Seth
Billy
Asher
Tyler

This coming Thurs, Oct 7, at 7:30pm, please join the discussion about how to help. If you or groups you are involved with are discussing how to help prevent bullying and youth suicide and want to bring about change in our community, join us in this community-wide effort.

Many of us are currently working to organize a vigil to honor the lives lost. We are making a commitment to end the victimization of LGBTQ youth and to reaffirm the importance of treating others with dignity and respect. We want your ideas, so we welcome and encourage everyone to attend this informational meeting on Thurs to plan the vigil.

The meeting will be in the Ballroom on the 3rd floor of Newcomb Hall on the UVA campus. There is inexpensive parking in the UVA bookstore parking garage (right next to Newcomb).

Please forward this announcement widely and invite everyone you know. We hope to reach many in our community at UVA and beyond, including teens, parents, teachers, school administrators, and others who work directly with youth.

Thank you and please let me know if you have questions. Let's create change,

Rachel Farr
rachel.farr@gmail.com

The Enigma We Answer by Living

I've been thinking a lot lately about how we are all connected. Not just we humans, though that connection is hard enough to see sometimes. But how we are connected to all creation, and how God longs for us to be reconciled with all creation.

I think this poem catches some of what I'm trying to say. It is a gift from our wonderful friend Karen in Tennessee.

The Enigma We Answer by Living
By Alison Hawthorne Deming

Einstein didn't speak as a child
waiting till a sentence formed and
emerged full-blown from his head.

I do the thing, he later wrote, which
nature drives me to do. Does a fish
know the water in which he swims?

This came up in conversation
with a man I met by chance,
friend of a friend of a friend,

who passed through town carrying
three specimen boxes of insects
he'd collected in the Grand Canyon —

one for mosquitoes, one for honeybees,
one for butterflies and skippers,
each lined up in a row, pinned and labeled,

tiny morphologic differences
revealing how adaptation
happened over time. The deeper down

he hiked, the older the rock
and the younger
the strategy for living in that place.

And in my dining room the universe
found its way into this man
bent on cataloguing each innovation,

though he knows it will all disappear—
the labels, the skippers, the canyon.
We agreed then, the old friends and the new,

that it's wrong to think people are a thing apart
from the whole, as if we'd sprung
from an idea out in space, rather than emerging

from the sequenced larval mess of creation
that binds us with the others,
all playing the endgame of a beautiful planet

that's made us want to name
each thing and try to tell
its story against the vanishing.

Change, anxiety, forming leaders: Big topics of the last few days

ORKNEY SPRINGS, VIRGINIA -- Since Sunday afternoon, I have been here at Shrine Mont, the retreat center for the Diocese of Virginia nestled into the mountains on the western side of the Shenandoah Valley.

Cell phones don't work well here, but the internet wireless gizmo in the main building keeps us connected to the outside world. But I must say, it is an odd sight to see a room full of clergy checking their Facebook pages on their laptops at a religious retreat center.

On Sunday and Monday I was part of a small group of diocesan lay leaders and clergy engaged in far-ranging conversation about the current state of ordained ministry in the Episcopal Church and in the Diocese of Virginia. It was a candid and fascinating conversation and I felt privileged to be invited to be a part. We were very ably led in the discussions by the Rev. Susan Goff, the canon to the ordinary here in Virginia.

I was asked to participate as a member of the diocesan Committee on the Diaconate, which oversees the education and formation of those seeking ordination as vocational deacons. The vocational diaconate is very new to the Diocese of Virginia, and I was able to share my own experience with deacons on the West Coast (which is why I was asked to be in this conversation).

Our diaconate committee met with the diocesan Committee on the Priesthood, the Commission on Ministry, and the Board of Examining Chaplains, all of which have oversight on specific aspects of the ordination process. Everyone in the room had a different perspective on the topic of ordination, and my committee was asked to bring into focus the vocational diaconate as it might look in Virginia.

So far, no permanent deacons have been ordained in this diocese (we hope the first class will be ordained next year). It is a challenge for people in this diocese to picture what this third order of ordained ministry looks like without seeing it. We had a very healthy and fruitful discussion on the topic.

More broadly, we grappled with even bigger issues than a particular order of ministry. We talked extensively about the challenges facing the Church as it attempts to minister in a radically changing world. We talked about how well we are raising up, forming and educating ordained and lay church leaders for institutions that are undergoing tremendous change amidst a culture and society that is undergoing tremendous change.

We had to ask the hard questions: Do 1950s methods of education and formation meet the needs of the Church in 21st century? How can we adjust? How does our Episcopal tradition provide a useful structure for meeting the needs of ministry in this changing world? Where does the structure get in the way? How are the seminaries meeting these needs? How are the seminaries missing the mark?

We came to no firm answers, but many more questions. As it happens, next week I will be returning to my own seminary, the Church Divinity School of the Pacific in Berkeley, California, as a member of the Alumni Board. Our conversations in Virginia will definitely inform the conversation with my seminary friends next week.

After these conversations concluded late Monday, our smaller group then joined the Fall clergy conference of the Diocese of Virginia, also here at Shrine Mont. The topic: Understanding and managing conflict and anxiety in our congregations, a rather pertinent topic for those of us who had been in the earlier discussions. We had to begin by looking at our own personal anxiety and times of conflict.

During the clergy conference, we heard presentations about family emotional systems theory, much of which I've heard before, but it is always helpful to gain a new perspective (and bring home a few new handouts). The emphasis was on how our explicit and implicit expectations combine with personal stories and our unwritten internal rule books to create emotional feelings and reactions. That is true for individuals and it is true for congregations.

Much of the wisdom we heart boiled down to this: Take a deep breath, and hit the pause button before reacting. Feelings are facts, feelings are real, but feelings don't always have to dictate how we react as individuals or as a group. We can't always manage how we feel, but we can manage how we act.

These have been very fruitful, fascinating and deep conversations, and I am grateful that St. Paul's has allowed me to be a part.

St. Francis Blessing of the Animals video

Here's a video, by Lori, of our St. Francis Blessing of the Animals this past Sunday, with musical soundtrack. This was a lot of fun. Enjoy! And then see the photos below the video.

Bearded Dragons and the Blessing of the Animals

On Sunday we had our St. Francis Blessing of the Animals, and we said prayers and sprinkled water on quite a collection of God's wonderful creation. Many dogs, one cat (our 19-year-old Chrissy, brave veteran of many St. Francis days).

Award for the most exotic animal? Joanna's pet Bearded Dragon, a lizard native to Australia.

We also had a procession of the animals in the new Meditation Garden.

Here's a few photos from Sunday. Enjoy!

Photos by Megan Brett.

The Monday Funnies

I am away for a couple of days at a Diocese retreat for clergy, and we are talking about very important weighty matters, especially finding out what everyone else does. So I think the cartoon by Dave Walker is especially appropriate.

And here's a couple of jokes to start your work week. At the expense of us religious people, of course.

Enjoy the Monday Funnies . . .

* * *

An elderly man took his little grandson for a walk around the local cemetery. Pausing before one gravestone he said, "There lies a very honest man. He died owing me 50 dollars, but he struggled to the end to pay off his debts, and if anyone has gone to heaven, he has."

They walked on a bit further and then came to another grave. The old man pointed to the gravestone and said, "Now there's a different type of man altogether. He owed me 60 dollars and he died without ever trying to pay me back. If anyone has gone to hell, he has."

The little boy thought for a while and then said, "You know, Grandpa, you are very lucky."

"Why?" asked the old man in surprise.

"Well, whichever place you go to, you'll have some money to draw on."

* * *

The church choir was putting on a car wash to raise money to pay their expenses for a special trip. They made a very large sign, CAR WASH FOR CHOIR TRIP, and on the given Saturday business was very good. But by two o'clock the skies clouded and the rain poured and there were hardly any customers.

Finally, one of the girl washers had an idea. She printed up an even bigger poster which said, WE WASH (then an arrow pointing skyward) GOD RINSES.

Business boomed!

The One who comes to us as a servant, who is at our doorstep

My sermon today is based on Luke 17:5-10:

* * *

Giving is living

As many of you know, I used to be a newspaper reporter. I spent nearly a quarter-century with pen and notebook in hand, pounding out newspaper stories on daily deadline.

The first newspaper I worked for was in a tough working-class town east of Los Angeles. The paper, the Riverside Press-Enterprise, was the boot camp of newspapers – no nonsense, demanding, get-it-done, do-it-now, and perfect accuracy expected in every story. No excuses.

I bring this up because this gospel story today reminds me of my first managing editor, a drill-sergeant-of-a-guy.

“Do you thank the slave for doing what was commanded?”

And the correct response? “We are worthless slaves; we have done only what we ought to have done!”

Whew, what to do with that?

To compound my joy with the assigned readings, today is supposed to be the annual stewardship sermon.

This lesson comes off as “give us your money but don’t expect to be thanked.”
That might be how to run a newspaper but it doesn’t work well in the church. So I want to begin by thanking each of you for your generosity. I want to thank you for your faithfulness in your home, in the classroom, at work and all the places you go beyond these walls, and especially for your generosity with St. Paul’s.

Here at St. Paul’s, we cannot do anything without you. We exist because you give. A thousand thanks to each and every one of you today.

This morning I want to have a little straight talk about our ministry and mission that we share together, and let’s see if these lessons can lead us somewhere.

In the time that I have been here, we’ve talked a great deal about our role with the University of Virginia, creating a place of encouragement for students, faculty and staff.

We’ve talked about being a beacon of hope in the community through IMPACT, PACEM, Habitat for Humanity and other projects that assist the poorest among us.

We’ve talked about being a spiritual home for families and children, where people of all ages can grow in faith and make connections with each other.

We’ve talked about being a place for healing, where people can bind their wounds and find comfort and solace in their grief or hurt.

We’ve talked about a filling our church with prayers that honor and uphold our Christian and Episcopalian traditions, and we hold worship services not only on Sundays but also on weekdays.

All of this describes how and what we do. They are the means; they are our tools of ministry.

But the tools are not the mission.

Our mission, I believe, is to be partners with God in bringing alive God’s dream of healing and wholeness among us, and in the world around us.

Our mission is to be partners with God in bringing alive God’s abundant grace-filled kingdom, God’s peace, God’s shalom.

The mission never changes even if the tools change from time to time.

Our mission requires that we see ourselves not as consumers of religion, but as partners – true participants – in our faith.

Participation, I believe, means reaching deep inside ourselves for the “better angels of our being.”

We can do that by our giving of our time, our talent, and yes, our money, as each of us has portions of each to give.

St. Paul’s is a wonderfully vibrant parish precisely because so many of you give so very much of yourselves, and in so many ways.

Our giving enables us to welcome everyone who walks in our door so that we can share God’s healing grace with them. Others before us lovingly passed this church onto us. Now it’s our turn to give this church to others through our own giving.

As the late- Archbishop of Canterbury William Temple once said, the Church is the only institution in the world that exists for people who are not its members.

Yet this giving business is deeper than an institution, as important as that is. We are called to live a life of giving so that others may live fully, and with them, that we may live more fully as human beings.

That’s why we give.

If you are a parent, you already give abundantly to your children; they are transformed by your giving, and so are you. Or maybe you share in the community, or in the workplace or in the classroom. All that giving builds up.

I am continually inspired by how many of you go the extra mile in your giving, not because you have to, but because something deep inside compels you.

Recently I’ve been awestruck by stories I’ve heard from some of you who work at the Haven, the new day shelter for homeless people in downtown Charlottesville.
I’ve heard stories about homeless people who seemingly have nothing at all, and how they give things to each other. If someone needs a sandwich, another gives half of theirs. If someone needs a pair of socks, another gives an extra pair.

Do you want to know where God’s grace – God’s shalom – shines into the open for all of us to see? It is in the giving by people with so little to give.

How much more of God’s grace could shine into the world through the giving of those of us who have so much more to give?

But what to make of these lessons today? Where is the grace? Is there a connection with our giving?

After scratching my head this week, I went to the biblical commentaries, and it was noted that this gospel lesson today ties back to the harsh sounding parable last week of the rich man punished in Hades while Lazarus, the poor man with sores, goes to heaven.

The parable is an allegory about Jesus – Jesus is the poor man with sores – and the rich man hadn’t noticed him while he lived.

The rich man’s stinginess got in his way – his selfishness blocked him from seeing who was living on his doorstep.

The lessons tie together because they are invitations from Jesus to look, to see God’s shalom all around us. He’s telling us we can expect to see it but we have to look.

But to see God’s shalom, we need to see not from the selfish vantage point of the stingy man who expect thanks, but from the vantage point of a giving servant who expects no thanks.

And Jesus beckons us to take what we see and step out in faith, to become partners with him in transforming the world: “Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.”
That partnership is the meaning of discipleship.

Yet those first disciples ask a question: How much faith do we need to be disciples? Does it take a lot? Because, really, we don’t have much.

Jesus replies, you don’t need much:

“If you had faith the size of a mustard seed, you could say to this mulberry tree, ‘Be uprooted and planted in the sea,’ and it would obey you.”

Then he turns the tables by saying, in effect, there’s a better question you haven’t asked: In whom do you have faith?

My answer:

Faith in the One who finds the lost sheep; the One who invites everyone to the dinner banquet. Faith in the One who will walk with you no matter what happens to you, and goes with you no matter where.

Faith in the One who comes to us as a lowly servant born in a stable, and is sitting on our doorstep even when we don’t notice.

He is the One who expects not even thanks. He is the prince of peace, Christ Jesus, who gives everything to us still. AMEN.

Faeder ure pu pe eart on heofonum ("Our Father who art in heaven")

Many people prefer the Lord's Prayer in "traditional" English ("Our Father who art in heaven..."). However, that English is relatively recent. A friend sent this along the other day; it is the Lord's Prayer in 11th century English, and thankfully it comes with subtitles. This takes about 3 minutes to watch, and the mystical tone comes through. Imagine those 11th century Angl0-Saxon monks saying this together in the stony monasteries of York. Enjoy . . .

Choosing the better good in our communities

Last Friday, the University of Virginia community held its "Day of Dialogue" to talk about, in the words of UVA President Teresa Sullivan, how to become a more "caring community" in the aftermath of the murder last spring of a student. Many of our St. Paul's students, faculty and staff attended.

The final talk was given by English Professor Michael Suarez, who is a friend of mine and also is a Jesuit priest. Michael's remarks are about UVA, but really he is talking about every community everywhere. This takes about 25 minutes to view; I highly recommend you take the time. Blessings...

Gentle wonderful rain and our Community Garden

We are getting much welcome rain here in Charlottesville, and the best kind of rain for our gardens: gentle, soaking rain. The dampness is bringing out the wonderful earthy smell of late summer.

Our Community Garden volunteers were out in force a few days ago, joining with volunteers from Trinity Episcopal Church, the parish located in the garden's neighborhood (more on that exciting development in another post). They've added new compost, planted spinach and other greens, cleared away a lot of dead brush, and prepared the garden for winter.

Here is a photo I took late yesterday during the rain. Enjoy your garden!

The Monday Funnies

Monday has rolled around once more, and it's time for a smile to start your work week. Let's do it today at the expense of our own dear Episcopal Church, in good-natured fun, of course. After all, our House of Bishops just finished its fall meeting in Arizona, and something funny must have happened. We just haven't heard what yet. So maybe this will spark a leak.

The item below comes courtesy of our friend and St. Paul's colleague Paula Kettlewell. Going with it, a cartoon by church observer Dave Walker.

Enjoy your Monday . . .

What Episcopalians believe for Sure, Almost, Sometimes, Perhaps

Episcopalians occasionally believe in miracles and sometimes even expect them, particularly during stewardship canvasses and when electing bishops or recruiting church school teachers.

Episcopalians firmly believe that coffee hour is the eighth sacrament, but only if the coffee is caffeinated.

Episcopalians believe strongly in scripture, reason and tradition, and while they aren't sure what it is they believe about these three things, there is almost universal agreement that that is hardly the point.

Episcopalians who have never been on the Vestry claim they don't know what goes on in Vestry meetings. Episcopalians who have been on the Vestry claim they don't know either.

Episcopalians believe anything worth doing is especially worth doing if it has an obscure incomprehensible title attached to it (e.g. verge, sexton, thurifer, chasuble, suffragan, canon, dean, coadjutor).

Likewise, Episcopalians believe any place worth visiting is greatly enhanced by a name which only obliquely describes it (e.g., nave, narthex, sacristy, oratory, and church school supply closet).

Some Episcopalians believe that Rite I is the best expression of the liturgy. Many Episcopalians believe Rite II is better. Most Episcopalians haven't noticed the difference; they just hope it all gets over by noon.

Entertaining Angels Unawares: Sermon by University of Virginia President Teresa Sullivan

I am not preaching today, so I thought I would bring you the sermon by Dr. Teresa Sullivan, the president of the University of Virginia, who preached at St. Paul's on August 29, our Convocation Sunday. She gave us much to think and pray about; her office sent us a copy of her sermon last week, and so I bring it to you today. The lessons she used that day were Sirach 10:12-18, Psalm 112, Hebrews 13:1-8, 15-16, and Luke 14:1, 7-14. Here is her sermon:

Entertaining Angels Unawares
Sunday, August 29, 201010:00 a.m.
St. Paul’s Memorial Church

By Dr. Teresa Sullivan
President of the University of Virginia

Good morning. I’m pleased to be with you this Sunday at St. Paul’s. I was here last winter to help celebrate your 100th anniversary. I’m glad to be back.

As you probably know, I am a sociologist, and the heart of sociology is the study of social stratification – or how humans take differences among people and translate those differences into enduring inequalities. It’s nearly universal among human societies, and it is even found among animals. Imagine a flock of chickens penned together; they will immediately establish what we call a “pecking order” among themselves. The chickens enforce their pride of place with a sharp beak.

Jesus knows about our pecking orders. In today’s passage from the Gospel of Luke, Jesus has been invited to a Sabbath dinner by one of the Pharisees. He decides to tell a story about a wedding feast, but the implication for the guests in the room with Him is pretty clear. Much like the wedding guests in the parable, each guest at the Sabbath dinner is seeking the best position, and Jesus offers some practical advice: don’t take the highest seat, because someone more important than you might be invited. Take the lowest seat, and then you might be invited by your host to go higher. The punch-line is one that will be heard again and again in the Gospels: he who exalts himself shall be humbled, and he who humbles himself shall be exalted.

This is more than wedding etiquette advice. The Gospel makes clear that it is God Who is ultimately in charge of the exalting and the humbling. Six months before the birth of Jesus, Mary in her Magnificat makes the agency of God very clear: “He Who is mighty has done great things for me, and holy is His name. He has struck down the mighty from their thrones, and has exalted the lowly. He has filled the poor with good things, and the rich He has sent away empty.” (Luke 1:52)

The message is not an easy one for disciples to learn. As His apostles are taking their seats for His last paschal meal with them, and just before He gives them the example of washing their feet, they are discussing among themselves who is the greatest (Luke 22:24). Jesus has basically the same answer for this status-seeking. In the Gospel of Mark He says, "If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all." (Mark 9:34-36). In the longer answer recounted by Luke, He offers greater detail: "The kings of the Gentiles lord it over them; and those who exercise authority over them call themselves Benefactors. But you are not to be like that. Instead, the greatest among you should be like the youngest, and the one who rules like the one who serves.” (Luke 22:25-26)

Thus, in the Kingdom of God, the leaders serve. The pecking ceases. If there is to be any exaltation done, it is left to the Host of the wedding feast.

There is a second message here that is also important for us to hear. In the latter verses of the reading, Jesus advises the banquet host not to invite only his wealthy friends and relatives to dinner, in the hope that they will return the favor. He tells him instead to invite “the poor, the crippled, the lame, and the blind.” (Luke 14:13)

You might recall that later in the gospel of Luke, in chapter 18, Jesus said to His disciples, “Suffer little children to come unto me …” (Luke 18:16) when the disciples tried to forbid children from approaching Him. He was famously friendly to the outcasts of His time – tax collectors, prostitutes, Roman officers, even the hated Samaritans.

You get the idea. In Jesus’ words and in His actions, we discern a single message: God may have a different idea about a human being’s value than society does. The little children, the lepers, the last in society’s eyes — these are first in God’s eyes.

All of us can learn a lesson from these words: Care for those around you, especially those who are most in need. This is one of the foundations of a strong community based on caring and shared responsibility for one another’s well-being. The Kingdom of God has many bridges, but not so many fences.

I hope that those of us who are connected to UVA can hear this message and take it to heart. Many in this community are still grappling with the aftermath of Yeardley Love’s death last spring, and aching from the loss of a young woman so full of promise. As we begin a new academic year, we are continuing conversations that began in the wake of Yeardley’s death.

We have scheduled a Day of Dialogue for Friday, Sept. 24. It will be a day of open and vigorous discussion about violence, violence prevention, and campus safety. Our goal is to create a caring community, one whose members recognize their shared responsibility for each other. I hope all of you who are able to participate will do so.

UVA students have launched another initiative with a similar purpose. You may have heard, or you may soon hear, about the “Get Grounded Coalition.” Composed of student-run organizations, the coalition is working to create a culture of shared responsibility on the Grounds — to teach all of us to be vigilant and to look out for each other’s well-being.

We want to challenge the so-called “bystander behavior” that may cause students and others to stand aside and remain passive in potentially dangerous situations, either because they don’t recognize the situation as problematic or because they don’t believe it’s their responsibility to take action. We want each of us to take ownership of this community and to help take care of everyone in it.

Today’s reading from the epistle to the Hebrews says, “Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by doing that some have entertained angels without knowing it.” (Hebrews 13:2) The King James Version of the same verse says, “Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.”

Ask yourself this question: If you happened to encounter an angel unawares, how would you treat him or her? What if this angel-in-disguise were a stranger, or someone who looks different from you, or someone who is on the low end of the socio-economic ladder, or someone suffering from physical or mental distress?

This morning, let’s affirm our commitment to caring for every member of this community every day. Let’s make this promise to ourselves and to each other. Let’s promise not to stand by when someone else needs help. Let’s promise to take responsibility for each other. Let’s promise to show hospitality and kindness to everyone around us — even the strangers, who, for all we know, might be angels.

Your neighbors might not exalt you for taking such responsibility. Your friends might criticize you. But building a community of caring is a very positive long-term investment. Jesus promises the reward at the resurrection of the just. And then we might hear that Voice, familiar to us even though we have never heard it before, saying to us, “Friend, move up higher.”

God bless you. And God bless the University of Virginia.

Photos by Bonny Bronson

Inclusion: It's about mission

We often hear that the effort toward full inclusion of lesbian gay bisexual transexual (LGBT) people in the church is causing some people to leave the church.

What we don't hear much about is how inclusion is attracting new people, especially those who feel on the fringes, or alienated, or who have never been a part of a faith community.

The Rev. Susan Russell, who is one of the guiding forces of Integrity, the organization that has worked for years for inclusion, wrote this the other day on her blog about a meeting in Phoenix of the Episcopal Church Standing Committee on Liturgy and Music. A friend of mine said this is item from Susan is a show stopper, and it is. And I am proud to know most of the people in the photo (SCLM Task Force Team: Patrick Malloy, Susan Russell, Thad Bennett, Ruth Meyers (chair), Jay Johnson).

Here is an excerpt from Susan's blog:

From An Inch at A Time...

A Missional Moment (AKA "Dessert with a side of Evangelism")

By Susan Russell

The conversation in the room was lively and energetic – and at the end of the session Bishop Kee Sloan (Bishop Suffragan, Alabama and a member of the SCLM) invited those who wanted to continue the conversation with us to grab some lunch after Eucharist and come back to the plenary room. About a dozen folks chose to do that and we had a great opportunity to clarify some questions, engage in some very interesting dialogue and get feedback on both process and content.

One comment that really stood out for me was a bishop’s challenge to us to add “Missional” to the list of opportunities the blessing of same sex relationships offers the church – a list that already included “Sacramental” and “Eschatological.” And of course I agree. This work isn’t just about the couples whose relationships will be blessed. It’s also about the mission of the church that will be blessed by a more expansive opportunity to incarnate God’s inclusive love.

I had no idea how soon we would get a chance to experience one of those missional opportunities in action.

So – having concluded the presentation part of the day we had a late lunch and then took some time out (AKA “naps!") and then reconvened to debrief our work over dinner in the hotel dining room. There was a lot to talk about – and we settled into a long, lively dinner that included a dessert course with a side order of evangelism as three young hotel staff members came up to the table and individually engaged with us about the work the Episcopal Church is doing.

The first one was a waiter – “Michael” – who said as a gay man it had never occurred to him that there were churches that would welcome him rather than condemn him. He thanked us for giving him hope that he hadn’t imagined he’d ever have with an earnestness that was deeply moving.

A few minutes later “Amanda” … our waitress … came up to the table to say that she’d encouraged Michael to come talk to us because she’d found him crying in the kitchen after listening to our conversations. She was raised Catholic but it “didn’t fit” anymore and she wanted to know where she should go to find an Episcopal Church. I gave her my card and told her to email me and I’d hook her up with folks in Phoenix.

The third was “Vanessa” … their supervisor … who thanked us for connecting with them and told us about her experience of finally finding a church home that helped her claim a relationship with God … and then being devastated when that church family rejected her gay friend. She’s going to email me, too.

It blew us away.

While we were obsessing about perfecting PowerPoint slides and refining our messaging about the SCLM project, these earnest young people responded to the few crumbs of conversation they overheard at our dinner table like they were starving for hope. And if those crumbs gave them that hope and energy – and gave them the courage to come up to a table full of “church people” and say, “Wow … we want to know more about what you’re talking about!” then imagine how they and countless others like them are yearning for the banquet we set every time we gather to witness to God’s inclusive love.

It is about mission.

It is about the building of the Body.

And it is about the vocation of the Episcopal Church to be the voice of love, justice and compassion to ALL those yearning for what Michael and Amanda and Vanessa came looking for at our dinner table last night.

A tiny tear, a loss, the beloved in us is born

Life comes with tears. Life does not shelter us from the pain of loss, or the emptiness of unfairness. But without tears, we wouldn't understand life. We would be a shell, closed, hidden, trapped inside ourselves, dead.

Here is a gift from our friend Karen in Tennessee that captures this better than I can explain it:

Some say you're lucky
By Gregory Orr‏

Some say you're lucky
If nothing shatters it.

But then you wouldn't
Understand poems or songs.
You'd never know
Beauty comes from loss.

It's deep inside every person:
A tear tinier
Than a pearl or thorn.

It's one of the places
Where the beloved is born.

Rekindling Our Light: We are responsible for the world

Last evening we hosted Rekindling Our Light, an interfaith prayer service in remembrance of victims of domestic violence, especially women students. We gathered, we lit candles, we prayed, we sang, we sat in silence.

I found the experience incredibly powerful and spiritually moving. I am grateful so many students attended, and I am grateful to The Rev. Ann Willms and United Ministries for organizing it.

Christians, Muslims, Jews, Buddhists, Hindus came together to offer prayers, each in their own tradition. We remembered the murder of Yeardley Love, a 4th year student who was murdered last year allegedly by her boyfriend.

We remembered Morgan Harrington, a student from Virginia Tech who turned up killed, left in a remote field, after a rock concert here in Charlottesville.

We remembered many others.

We prayed for peace, we prayed for an end to all forms of violence, and we asked for forgiveness for our neglect, our ambivalence, our ignorance.

My friend Jake Rubin, the rabbi with the Brody Jewish Center at the University of Virginia (Hillel), was with us last night at Rekindling Our Light. Last Saturday marked Yom Kippur, the Jewish day of atonement, the day of asking for forgiveness. Rabbi jake preached powerfully about domestic violence last Saturday, and I am offering his words to you today. I believe this is an important sermon and I hope you will read it:

Yom Kippur 2010

By Rabbi Jake Rubin

Today as we are fully immersed in a period of self reflection, I want to talk about a difficult subject that affects us all whether we know it or not. There is a line in the Al Het, one of the confessionals we say on Yom Kippur, which says, “For the sin we have committed against you through violence.” Generally we think of UVa as a peaceful place, but we know that this is not always the case. We were reminded of this all too well last year on multiple occasions. Yeardley Love’s murder was certainly the most obvious example of this reality but there are many others.

Though it is not the most pleasant topic, today, I want to talk about intimate partner violence, or sexual assault, and our response to it as a community. Intimate partner violence is a pattern of physically, sexually, and/or emotionally abusive behaviors used by one individual to control another. It includes rape, sexual assault, and physical, emotional or psychological abuse.

This summer in the wake of the Yeardley Love murder, I had the opportunity to participate in a Survivor Support and Ally Training Workshop with the Women’s Center at UVa. Though I certainly knew about Yeardley Love’s case and that intimate partner violence was prevalent on college campuses, I had no idea as to the extent of its prevalence nationally and even more disturbing its prevalence here at UVa. According to national statistics, over the course of four years in college, a woman has a 25% chance of being a victim of sexual assault. That is 1 out of every 4 women. Look around the room. Conservatively there are 80 women here, that means the chances are that 20 of the women here today could be victims of sexual assault.

And just in case you might think that UVa is different than other college campuses, a study done at UVa a few years ago of almost 800 undergraduate female students shows it is actually worse – 29% of those surveyed were victims of rape or of attempted rape and 34% were victims of unwanted sexual contact and these figures probably underestimate the actual rates. In this same study 43% of the sorority members in the study had been raped or had been victims of attempted rape. The primary factor – alcohol and drugs. If these statistics aren’t scary enough, according to this study 61% of perpetrators were boyfriends, dates, or friends. Only 3% of these crimes were carried out by strangers! While I have given you statistics regarding women, it is important to note that men can be the victims of intimate partner violence too.

These numbers were shocking to me and should be disturbing to you. Many times I have heard people and you may be one of them say, “Well that is disturbing, but we don’t have these issues in the Jewish community. “ They and you would be wrong. The Jewish community has the same rates of intimate partner violence as those of other religious groups, somewhere between 15 – 25%. In addition, as full members of the University community and on the most fundamental level, the human community, this problem is all of ours together to confront.

On Yom Kippur, we say multiple confessionals that are laundry lists of the sins that we have committed throughout the year. All of these confessionals end with a –nu ending, ahsamnu, bagadnu, or al het shechatanu. This ending is the plural - meaning we have sinned not I have sinned. As I mentioned last night, this is to emphasize that even if we have not committed these sins ourselves, we have a responsibility as a community to ensure that these things do not happen under our watch.

To underscore just how important this communal responsibility is in Judaism, there is a rabbinic principle that a person cannot be put to death for a capital offense unless there were two witnesses who each prior to the capital offense warned the perpetrator that what they were about to do was punishable by death. From this we learn that it is the community’s responsibility to stand up and stay stop. It is our responsibility to make sure that intimate partner violence is not happening within our own community.

There are two other important Jewish values at play in this conversation. The first is b’tzelem elohim, or the idea that we are all created in the image of G-d. This is a core principle in Judaism, and it emphasizes the inherent worth of each and every person. We are to treat every person we meet, whether we know them intimately or not, as if there were divinity within them. We honor human beings as holy, we treat them with respect, we do not abuse them. To commit acts of violence against another human is deface the likeness of G-d.

This value of humans as created in the image of G-d should be understood in another way too. That is, we not only must treat others with respect but we also must honor ourselves. This means we have to respect ourselves enough to know that no one deserves to be in an abusive relationship. Each one of us has an inherent worth and nobody, nobody, should think that they are somehow at fault for being abused or that they deserve to be abused. There are so many resources in Charlottesville and at UVa for anyone who is in an abusive relationship – I am here, SARA, the Sexual Assault Resource Agency, and the UVa Women’s Center are here too – no one should ever feel alone and like they cannot get help.

The other Jewish value that I believe is central to this discussion is found in Leviticus, “You shall not stand idly by the blood of your neighbor.” The rabbis also believed that that if you were responsible for the death of one person, it was as if you destroyed an entire world. Again this underscores the importance of each and every life, but it is also a call to action. We cannot remain silent if we know someone is in danger. If you know someone is in an abusive relationship, Judaism teaches that you must say something. Offer to help get them in touch with someone who can help or share your concern with someone who is in a position to help. This is being an ally, and it is our responsibility as Jews and as humans.

In the coming weeks, we will be bringing in an organization called Jewish Women’s International and they will be providing training on how to recognize abuse and how to be an effective ally. There are also numerous student groups on Grounds that you can get involved with that work to raise awareness for this cause. Please keep your eyes open for this programming and attend these important trainings.

We as a Jewish community have an imperative to do tikkun olam, to repair the brokenness in our world. One of the most powerful illustrations of this idea is found in today’s haftarah in the book of Isaiah. In the haftarah Isaiah tells the Israelites that Gd doesn’t care if the people fast on Yom Kippur if in their day to day lives they treat people poorly and do not care of for the vulnerable in society. Isaiah speaking for G-d says, “Is this what you call a fast, a day acceptable to the Lord? Is not this the fast I look for: to unlock the shackles of injustice, to undo the fetters of bondage, to let the oppressed to free, and to break every cruel chain. Is it not to share your bread with the hungry, and to bring the homeless poor into your house? When you see the naked, to clothe them, and never to hide yourself from your own kin?” The message is clear actions speak louder than words. We can pray all we want on this day or any other, but if it is not coupled with action we are not truly doing tikkun olam.

Sometimes this idea of repairing the world can be a difficult and somewhat daunting task. Where do we begin? How can we help? When we treat each other with respect and honor the divinity within each of us, when we break the silence and stand up for what is right, and when we help someone who is an abusive relationship, we piece by piece begin to repair the brokenness in our world. There is a wonderful rabbinic teaching that says, “We are not obligated to complete the task, but neither are we free to refrain from it.” Together, as a Jewish community, let’s begin to be allies to those in abusive relationships, let’s make it clear to the University community and to any other community of which we are apart that we will not remain silent while our friends, family, roommates, classmates, partners, or anyone else are being hurt. Shanah tovah.

Please pray for Teresa Lewis, scheduled to be executed Thursday

I would ask your prayers today for Teresa Lewis, who is scheduled to be executed Thursday here in Virginia for the murders of her husband and his son in an insurance scam. I would also ask your prayers for Governor Robert McDonnell, who has declined to commute her sentence to life in prison.

This has become an emotional issue on all sides in recent days. Lewis, who is mentally retarded, was convicted of being the "mastermind" in the murders. The two men who carried out the killings were given life sentences.

The Washington Post wrote a factual story on the case over the weekend, which you can read HERE. I also wrote about this case a few weeks ago on this blog, which you can read HERE.

The Episcopal Church has taken a consistent stand against capital punishment since 1958, and has reaffirmed that position at several general conventions. You can read a resolution from 1991 by clicking HERE.

This case, I believe, highlights the arbitrariness of the death penalty. I am not an activist on this issue, and I have no intention of becoming one. My own opposition to the death penalty extends beyond the immediate case and to capital punishment generally. I wrote a long reflection about the death penalty last summer, drawing on my own experience with two friends who were viciously murdered. You can read that by clicking HERE.

The Washington DC Peace Center is publicizing many vigils around the state on Thursday. There will be a vigil in front of the Charlottesville Circuit Court, at 315 East High Street, at 12 noon on Thursday. For more information, click HERE.

I would again plead that the governor show mercy and that we keep him in our prayers. You can email the governor by clicking HERE.

Photos from our Centennial Sunday celebration

Here are a few spectacular photographs of our Centennial Sunday celebration, taken by Dudley Rochester. Enjoy

The Rev. Ann Willms, celebrant

Our magnificent choir.

Our acolytes lead the way.

Holding court with admirers.

Lunch is served.

The Monday Funnies

Once again it is time for a few laughs at the expense of organized -- and disorganized -- religion. May your Monday be not too stressful, may your boss smile at you, and may you speed your way home at the end of the day, but avoid the long arm of the law on the way. Here also are a couple of church signs for your consideration. Enjoy the Monday funnies. . .

* * *

A pastor, known for his lengthy sermons, noticed a man get up and leave during the

middle of his message. The man returned just before the conclusion of the service. Afterwards the pastor asked the man where he had gone.

"I went to get a haircut," was the reply.

"But," said the pastor, "why didn't you do that before the service?"

"Because," the gentleman said, "I didn't need one then."

* * *

Joe Smith climbs to the top of Mt. Sinai to get close enough to talk to God.

Looking up, he asks the Lord, "God, what does a million years mean to you?"

The Lord replies, "A minute."

Smith asks, "And what does a million dollars mean to you?"

The Lord replies, "A penny."

Smith asks, "Lord, can I have a penny?"

The Lord replies, "In a minute."

* * *

THE LORD'S PRAYER (Laodicean Version)

Our Grandfather, who art in heaven, special be thy name,
Thy candy come, thy will be changed, on earth as in our wishful thinking.
Give us this day our daily cake;
And wink at our trespasses, as we wink at ourselves when we trespass
against others;
And lead us not into commitment, but deliver us from dedication.
For thine is the lap, and the chuckle, and the pat on the head, forever and
ever.
You bet!