* * *
A pastor was preaching an impassioned sermon on the evils of television. "It steals away precious time that could be better spent on other things," he said.
He advised the congregation to do what he and his family had done: "We put our TV away in the closet."
"That's right," his wife mumbled, "and it gets awfully crowded in there."
* * *
It was a blistering hot day and Adam and his two sons, Cain and Abel, were trudging across an expanse of burning, arid desert with their meagre supply of water slung in goatskins over their backs.
All at once, they came upon a lush, verdant oasis: a veritable Paradise filled with fruit trees and gorgeous flowers of every description. Wearily, they sat down to rest and to admire the lovely setting.
"Boys," sighed Adam to his two sons, "this is where your mother ate us out of house and home!"* * *
A Sunday school teacher asked, "Johnny, do you think Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the Ark?"
"No," replied Johnny. "How could he, with just two worms?"