The Monday Funnies

I am away for a couple of days at a Diocese retreat for clergy, and we are talking about very important weighty matters, especially finding out what everyone else does. So I think the cartoon by Dave Walker is especially appropriate.

And here's a couple of jokes to start your work week. At the expense of us religious people, of course.

Enjoy the Monday Funnies . . .

* * *

An elderly man took his little grandson for a walk around the local cemetery. Pausing before one gravestone he said, "There lies a very honest man. He died owing me 50 dollars, but he struggled to the end to pay off his debts, and if anyone has gone to heaven, he has."

They walked on a bit further and then came to another grave. The old man pointed to the gravestone and said, "Now there's a different type of man altogether. He owed me 60 dollars and he died without ever trying to pay me back. If anyone has gone to hell, he has."

The little boy thought for a while and then said, "You know, Grandpa, you are very lucky."

"Why?" asked the old man in surprise.

"Well, whichever place you go to, you'll have some money to draw on."

* * *

The church choir was putting on a car wash to raise money to pay their expenses for a special trip. They made a very large sign, CAR WASH FOR CHOIR TRIP, and on the given Saturday business was very good. But by two o'clock the skies clouded and the rain poured and there were hardly any customers.

Finally, one of the girl washers had an idea. She printed up an even bigger poster which said, WE WASH (then an arrow pointing skyward) GOD RINSES.

Business boomed!